There's just something about reading old xanga that makes me miss me. This time last year I would say that I would have never imagined myself in this place this year. It's wonderful, really. But I miss me. I miss not having so much along time but having freedom. I'm okay with my the compromise that is my relationship now. trading a best friend for a boyfriend is never a bad trade. At least not once you finally get use to it.

it's cold again. but its suppose to warm up. regardless, i've been sick. but at night I always hit my rhythm. Old xanga said that April 7th I took a "mental wellness day" last year. I'm thinking of making it annual.

Somethings that I use to believe were boring about me, i have realized, kind of make me.

I've been way to internal lately. and its getting old. by internal i mean all up in my head, being self-conscious and awkwardly aware. I need more time with a few specific people to help counteract. and i need to still figure out my J.O.B situation. Yes, it still makes me self-conscious.

Know what habit I have shook though? My attention-whore habit. I had a slight relapse a few weeks ago, but mainly I'm completely cured. it feels good and does help for sleeping at night.

xoxo <3